Manic Monday: You're Saying Cheese in a Can Isn't a Food Group?

Sprayable 'Cheese'?

WARNING: If you live in France, the home of the Slow Food Movement, you may want to skip this entire post because it will likely offend the hell out of you. Excuse m'oi.


The first week of January it seemed like the entire blogosphere posted about New Years resolutions, kicking habits, changes for the better, blah, blah, blah . . .


I didn't create such a post. I didn't vow to change shit. I sat in my chair, squirting pasturized, processed cheese-like food from a can onto anything and everything, munching away while reading blogs and tweets and Facebook page comments. "Change? Who me?" I asked as I found new and interesting things to spray with fake cheese that is so orange, it practically glows in the dark. (My personal favorite new combo, by the way, is extra sharp cheddar-product squirted onto B-B-Q flavored potato chips. Don't try this one at home kids - its strictly for professionals.)


As they say, it's all very fun until someone gets their eye poked out. My day of reckoning didn't come on January 1. Know why? 'Cause I refused to step on the scales. I still had a half a can of that fake cheese left (not to mention that half-eaten bag of BBQ chips). So my day of reckoning didn't come - until yesterday.
What?! Is it possible that eating every cookie in the tri-state area, dunked in a McDonald's vanilla-iced-full-of-sugar coffee, is bad for you? You can't be saying that consuming an entire bag of chips covered in cheeze whiz will pack on the pounds, can you? And don't tell me that sitting on your ass 12 hours a day writing (and reading and tweeting and blogging and e-mailing . . .), the click of your mouse being your sole form of exercise - don't tell me that's bad for you!


Today, Manic Monday, is a sad day of reckoning. I say a hearty "Farewell" to my beloved friend, the cheese in a spray can. Adieu, mon ami, until next December when I'm sure that I will, once again, spend some time spraying your nuclear-age- orange, super-charged with sodium deliciousness on everything that doesn't move out of the way. *tears*


Gotta go now. It's time for my once-hourly attempt to touch my toes. I'll keep you posted.

Book Review Friday: PROPHECY by Joanna Penn

Joanna Penn has done it again, and then some, with PROPHECY. Her character Morgan Sierra is back in page-turning (or on an e-reader, perhaps it's called button-clicking) read. If you have not yet read Joanna Penn's first book, Pentecost. An ARKANE Thriller., then buy that now and read it first. While you could read PROPHECY without having read Pentacost and still enjoy it, reading Pentacost first will enhance your enjoyment of Prophecy.

Morgan Sierra is still kicking butt and taking names as she and her partner Jake travel the world and unravel mysteries in order to stop a super-hot megalomaniac from starting Armageddon. If you're a fan of Dan Brown, then Joanna Penn is the author for you. Like Brown, Penn weaves information about religious art, icons and history with modern-day fears. The result is a face paced read, one that kept me up past my bedtime because I wanted to know what happens next.

Here are three things I really love about this book:

1. RECITATION OF FACTS TO A MINIMUM. Books like this one, where there is a significant amount of relevant facts for the reader to know, can so easily become a non-fiction textbook rather than a fiction story. As a reader, I don't want to become aware of the author and feel like in the middle of a story, the author has butted his/her head in and is giving me a recitation of facts (one of the reasons I don't read much historical fiction). In Penn's first book, while I enjoyed it quite a bit (I gave it 4 stars), there were times that the author spent a few too many paragraphs (in my opinion) reciting the wonderful facts she had learned from her research.
In PROPHECY, this doesn't happen. The reading is smooth, recitation kept to a minimum. There are plenty of wonderful facts thrown in but it is handled deftly. AND I LOVE learning about the various places this book takes me. I enjoy whizzing around the world with Morgan Sierra and learning about religious artifacts and iconography and the meanings behind them. Joanna Penn knows her stuff and in PROPHECY, author Penn allows her character to do the talking.

2. KICK-BUTT FEMALE PROTAGONIST. I don't think I'm alone when I say that I could go the rest of my life without reading another book with a wimpy female main character who is like the proverbial princess locked in the tower waiting to be rescued. Joanna Penn has created a wonderful character in Morgan Sierra, a character that can easily maintain a whole series of books. I really enjoyed learning more about Morgan in this second book of the Arkane series and I love that the author didn't tell us everything about her in Book 1. She's doling the information out book by book. And Ms. Penn created a character with plausible explanation for why she can go head to head with thugs and bad guys (where if I were to try to land a flat palmed thrust to a bad guy's face I'd end up with a broken wrist). Morgan Sierra's history continues to unfold for the reader and her background makes her abilities and actions believable. Morgan is sexy, smart and kicks butt. It's fun going for the ride with her.

3. COMMERCIAL FICTION THAT CAN ALSO PROVOKE THOUGHT AND DISCUSSION. I enjoy a book that's just a fun ride as much as the next person. But I also like a book that may inspire me to use my noodle, think about an issue, perhaps even enter into a lively debate with others based on the issues raised. Joanna Penn tackles the issue of religious extremism in this book and she does it very well. Why does someone strap a bomb to themselves and blow themselves and many others up in the name of God? The author is never preachy and again, the tendency of some authors is to start to lecture the reader when they address these kind of themes. Author Penn avoided this tendency and allowed the themes to unfold naturally and without instilling herself into the story as a lecturer. I enjoyed very much Penn's treatment of this complex and troubling topic -one so completely relevant to our current world situation.

Kudos to Joanna Penn. Looking forward to the next installment.


5 Hawks to PROPHECY by Joanna Penn!



I use the Hawk as a symbol because I like hawks and because there is a hawk named Boadicea in my novel Emily's House.

WINNERS of December Book Giveaway for Emily's House!!!

A great big THANK YOU to all who took the time to post comments and enter my first ever Book Giveaway on both the blog and my YouTube channel. I've decided to give away THREE books. Why three? Because that's how many books I have left from the first print run : )

So, without further ado, here are the WINNERS:

From the blog, JOSHUA GLENN.

And from the YouTube channel, BOOKMOVIEGUY and BOOKTRIXIE

How to claim your prize:

Simple, e-mail me your mailing address and I'll ship the book off to you, U.S.P.S. Priority Mail. My e-mail address is: NatWritesYA@gmail.com.

YOU MUST E-MAIL ME YOUR ADDRESS BY MONDAY, 1/9/12 or you forfeit your prize and I'll announce an alternate winner.

To all of you who have read Emily's House - and those who will get the book in the mail - I really appreciate reviews on Goodreads and Amazon and tagging the book on Amazon with appropriate tags is awesome too.

The last week of December was exciting with Emily's House hitting the top 25 in YA Science Fiction/Fantasy & Magic category!! Thank you to all who have purchased or borrowed the book.

In other news, I've decided to start posting reviews of reads I've enjoyed and I'll be doing that every Friday. My reviews will be a mix of adult and young adult reading as well as Indie books and traditionally published books. So check back on Fridays to catch my reviews and suggestions for good reads.

Thanks everyone and I hope you had a great holiday season and wishing you all a fantastic New Year filled with things you love!

3 Places to Enter December Book Giveaway for EMILY'S HOUSE

December Book Giveaway for Emily's House

Contest Rules & Fine Print:

WHAT YOU WIN: A signed copy of the paperback version of Emily's House: Book 1 of the Akasha Chronicles, by Natalie Wright. For every 100 entries, 1 book will be given away.

HOW TO ENTER: Leave a comment here OR on my Facebook Fan Page  OR on my YouTube Channel. In your comment, tell me what special ability or power you would most like to have OR special power or ability that you DO have. You can leave more than one comment, but you will only be entered one time.

WHO CAN ENTER: Contest open to anyone 13 or older. No purchase necessary.

WHEN: Entries closed December 31, 2011 at midnight.

WINNER(S) ANNOUNCED: Winner(s) will be announced January 4, 2012 HERE, on my blog AND on my Facebook Fan Page.

*OTHER RULES: Please adhere to the rules of Facebook, Blogger and YouTube in your comments. DO NOT post obscene or offensive material. Any such posts will be removed and will NOT be an entry in the contest.

5 Things I Learned on the Way to the NaNoWriMo Winner's Circle

Wow, what a month of literary abandon! I started strong, staying in track the whole first week. Then day job, parenting, Thanksgiving, and oh yeah - launching my first novel! - slowed me down. WAY down! But the NaNoWriMo pep talks got me back to the novel and then I started hearing from people who had read Emily's House, and they asked "When's the next one coming out?" That really fired me up and pushed me to the 50,000 word mark. Procrastination meant I had to write 15,000 in the last three days (I don't recommend this).

SO, here are the (top) five things I learned on my way to the NaNoWriMo Winner's Circle:


5. It is best NOT to fuel your month of literary abandon with Halloween candy and Thanksgiving leftovers.

I gained five pounds along with my 50,000 word manuscript!


4. I CAN write everyday. I won't feel the muse welling up from my soul every day. Some days, the muse has closed up shop and refuses to open, not for all the chocolate in the world. But NaNoWriMo teaches you to write anyway. And sometimes, unexpectedly, the muse decides to peek her head out and join the party. (But truthfully somedays that muse wench won't come out to play and it's just you at the computer by yourself with your Hershey's bar, staring at a blank screen or typing gibberish.)


3. It's not wise to cram 30% of the challenge into the last three days and writing for 10 hours in a single day isn't a lot of fun.

2. Writing is more fun with a community of friends urging you on. When you join the NaNoWriMo challenge, you have the great folks at the Office of Letters and Light there to support you with funny, amusing and effective pep talks. I especially enjoyed the pep talk from author Erin Morgenstern. Her bestselling novel (and a wonderfully imaginative read - I love it!), The Night Circus, was born during the month of November, several years ago, in Erin's NaNoWriMo months of literary abandon. What an inspiration!

And then there were the tweets and the posts and the applause and the "you can do its" from fellow Wrimos, all working toward the same goal. We held each other accountable and shared sentences and ups and downs (and virtual glasses of wine and chocolate and coffee - writer fuels). I wrote my first draft of my first two novels just about completely alone in the process. And that wasn't all bad. But it wasn't nearly so much fun as being in a community of folks all working toward the same goal and speaking the same language.


1. If you stick with it, you have given yourself a wonderful gift: a newly minted, messy, wonderful, surprising manuscript, beckoning you to dig in and mold it and shape it and play with it until it's a thing of beauty - a Novel.

Only 56 Hours Left and 12,500 Words to Go - NaNoWriMo 2011

The Writer on Deadline

This year I took up the NaNoWriMo challenge (that's short for National Novel Writing Month) this year. Write a novel (50,000) words in 30 days. If you're not a writer, to put this in perspective, my first novel, Emily's House, is about 84,000 and it took me over two years to get to the end of the first draft.
To make it really interesting, NaNoWriMo hit the same month I released my first book, Emily's House. A sane person would probably decide that doing both the same month wasn't a good idea. But who said we writer-types are the most sane people?!
And to make it even more interesting, my daughter was out of school for five days straight for the Thanksgiving holiday. It is a known fact that listening to the Disney channel and the Cartoon Network kills inspiration faster than alcohol kills brain cells.
No matter that it took me over two years to get to the end of the first draft of Emily's House. Or over a year to get to the end of the first draft of my second novel, H.A.L.F.
I figured that if I set my mind to it, I could do it. Hey, when I'm in the groove, I can write about 2000 words an hour. So only two hours a day times 30 days . . . I figured, I can even take some days off.
Here's what I learned this month. Some days it's hard to even find those two hours.
But I persevered and wrote whenever I could. And found out something important along the way.
When pressed to write every day, some days I just don't have much to say! This has come as a shock to me. I've never had writer's block. I've never been at a loss for words. 
But I've never forced myself to try to come up with words every day, day after day, for a solid month.
I'm at about 37,500 words, 12,500 to go and less than 3 days. The bad news is that's not a lot of time (especially when you consider that I have to work my "day job", take care of my family and eat and sleep).
But the GOOD news is that just last night I had the story epiphany I've been waiting for - the character and scene that I needed to pull it all together and juice it up. The inspiration I needed to push through and see how it all ends.
And I've been hearing from folks who have purchased Emily's House and they want Book 2! Having fans ask for more is a great kick in the pants to press on and keep writing.
Having a first draft is only the beginning, but oh, such an important beginning it is. I'm excited about Book 2 of the Akasha Chronicles, born during a crazy NaNoWriMo month, and I'm looking forward to sharing Emily's Trial with all of you!
If you're a NaNoWriMo-er, how did you do this year? What is the best part of the WriMo experience for you? The worst? And will you do it again?

5 Things Indie Authors Should Know BEFORE They Self-Publish

My first self-published novel, Emily's House, just went live on Amazon on November 15, 2011. There were times during the self-pubbing process that I looked this this:

I learned so much - and much of it the hard way! But you won't make the same mistakes I made because I'm going to share with you what I learned. So brave virgin Indies who dare to walk the Indie Road, I'm here to shine a bit of light your path. If you're new to Indie publishing, read this now but bookmark it and come back and read it further down the road too. And if you find it helpful, Tweet it, Facebook it, Stumble it and pass it along to your Indie friends and cohorts. Here are five tips and truths you should know before you start:

1.  Being a Writer is a Crazy-in-the-Head Profession to go Into and to Voluntarily Choose to Become your Own Publisher is a level of Nuts Generally Reserved for People with Tin Foil Hats Having Conversations with Invisible People at the Bus Stop. Okay, maybe you don't have to be certifiably mental to self-publish, but at times you'll feel like maybe you should be committed for taking it on. In February and March of 2011, Amanda Hocking, J.A. Konrath and Barry Eisler were in the news and splashing across Twitter and blogs. And you couldn't help but be infected by their enthusiasm and stories of how they'd done well - very well - without a publisher, thank you. None of them said it was easy. None of them said it was fast. And all of them were honest about the amount of time, energy, effort and published books - lots and lots of books - that it takes to "make it" as an Indie author. 
Okay to be fair, it is possible to write a book, run a spell check, maybe read it over a few times, do some corrections, then upload the puppy, slap a cover on and Voila! You have a book for sale. It is possible to do this for little to no financial investment and a fairly limited time investment. That is possible.
But you will not be successful if you do it that way.  Let me repeat that: If you put in little time and little money and little effort, you will get little to no return. Period.
There's a reason that publishing houses have a cadre of people working on putting out each book. It takes a good half dozen or more people to put out a good book! It really does.
And if you are your own publisher, then you will do a lot of the jobs that several people do at a publishing house + you'll hire people and/or beg and promise food and massages and a signed copy of your "sure to be a hit" first book to people to get the work done. So you'll have to manage those people and deadlines and review thier questions and drafts and e-mails and sometime pull out a bull whip and crack it on them to keep them moving toward your own deadline for when you want the book to come out (and God forbid you set a date and broadcast it across the known Universe).
If you self-publish, YOU are in charge of the project and the people and it's not always easy.
For Emily's House, I worked with six different professionals throughout the course of the writing, editing, and production of the book. This doesn't count the folks that I worked with on the book trailer. Each of these people have other projects and most have a "day job" and do this whole Indie book thing on the side. They are busy people. It is up to you, dear Indie publisher, to keep them all on task to produce the book that you've been dreaming of.
Tip #1 is this:  This is damned hard work and will suck up as much energy and time as a full-time job, if not more, so if you don't have the time and energy or desire to muck around with all the details and just want to write, don't self publish.


2.  Choose Wisely Who You will Entrust with Your Precious Baby. Here's the truth: It doesn't matter how many books the person has e-formatted or pdf'd or covers they've created or manuscripts they've edited, they may not be the right person for your project. Research the hell out of this. Don't just go with the person that created the cover for Josephina Millionseller Bookstar. Look at lots of covers and lots of e-books and Indie print versions of books and decide what you like and what you don't.  Then approach people who you think have done good work and ask them these questions: (1) How long will it take for you to complete my project; (2) What exactly will you do for me; and (3) How much will you charge and what does that fee include and what does it not include. You may have other questions, of course, but these three are essential. And once you've gotten the answers and compared amongst different providers and have chosen who you'll hire to do the work, then -


3. GET IT IN WRITING! Okay, I'm a lawyer so of course I'm going to say that. But believe it or not, I learned the hard way to get it in writing. And no, I'm not saying that I ran into anyone that was a cheat or fraud or anything like that. Get it in writing because it is extremely important that both you and the person doing a project for you have a clear understanding of what the project is; how long it will take; and the price. Don't take no or "I trust you" for an answer on this. If the person won't at least provide you an e-mail detailing the job and ask for your approval of it, then move on to someone else. It's good business to have a written agreement and bad form not to. And just because it's in writing doesn't mean it will happen, so - 


4. Follow Up but Don't Wait Until the Deadline for Their Work to Be Completed and to You has Already Passed. This one I learned the hard way - more than once! Don't be such a pestering PIA that your editor or cover designer wants to hurl sharp objects at you. BUT, don't be afraid to check in with them and see how things are going. If your designer said it would take two weeks and it's day 13 and you haven't seen or heard anything, check in with them. Send a short e-mail note saying something like, "Looking forward to seeing the draft of the cover. Do you have everything you need from me?" I had two significant delays (i.e. each time a week which, when you're on a deadline, can be killer) because I didn't check in with the person. In one instance, the designer thought she'd already sent me my file and hadn't. In the other instance, another person was waiting on a file from me and e-mailed me, but it was during a period was I was having a problem with the Cloud (that's another story) and I didn't get the e-mail. So there she is waiting for me and here I am (with a cloud over me) waiting for her, and in the meantime because I didn't want to pester I didn't have what I needed to move forward. Don't let this happen to you!
Remember, it's your proejct. It's your job to stay on top of it. You don't need to be an asshole. You do need to be vigilant and keep all the folks working for you on task.


5. It's Not as Simple as Pushing the Upload Button and There's a Whole Lot of Crap You Need to do / Should do After You Upload and Your Book Won't Be Available for Purchase in Every Store in Every State and Country Across the World in 24 hours so Don't Expect That. I'm not kidding on this one. It takes longer than you think. And until you hit "Upload", there's not a big note in bold from Amazon (or Smashwords or CreateSpace) telling you just how long things take (at least not that I saw). And this is important to know so take notes:


Kindle Direct Publishing - Once you upload your files for the Kindle version of your book, KDP says it will take up to 72 hours but generally it takes about 24 hours for it to go live in the U.S. That's actually amazing when you think about it but I guarantee you it will feel long! But remember: That is for the U.S. Amazon only. It can take 3-5 days for it to go live on Amazon UK, GE and FR (if you choose to sell your book there). So keep this in mind when you are announcing your book to be on sale on a specific date. To be safe, you better plan for at least 5 days for the e-book to be live on Kindle.


CreateSpace P.O.D. - Here's the scoop on timing. First, you will upload your files and you MUST order a proof copy (only order one because truly it is a proof - it will have "PROOF" written on the last page). You have to wait for this to ship before you can "Approve" your book to go to Review. Once you approve your Proof copy (and please, do take the time to thoroughly review this proof), then your book goes to the "Review" stage. My experience was that this stage only took a few days but they say to allow up to five (at least that's what it said when I did it).  So if you're doing the math as you read this, you'll see that from the time you upload your beautifully produced bestseller-in-waiting, you will need to wait approximately 7-14 days to have your book available on in paperback on CreateSpace. Then, if you want copies to give out or to sell yourself, remember that you have to order those and wait for them to be delivered (mini tip: CreateSpace shipping costs are pretty high and it will cost a fortune to have them rush delivered, so plan on enough time to get your books without rush delivery). CreateSpace is quick at printing and shipping, but still, it takes time so plan for it.


Print Version on Amazon: Even though the paperback version of your book will be available right away on CreateSpace, it will not be available right away on Amazon.  It took a full week for my book to show up on Amazon after it was uploaded at CreateSpace. AND, just because it shows up there doesn't mean you're all done (I'll go into more on that in my next blog post so check back).  My suggestion is that you plan on 10 days from the point that you upload your files to sending people to Amazon to buy the paper copy of your book.


Extended Distribution Channels:  If you upload to Smashwords (which I recommend) to get your book into the Barnes & Noble, iBook store and others, it will take 5-7 WEEKS for that to happen. You read that right. Same is true for CreateSpace paper version. So your book will be available on Amazon in print and as an e-book within a week of you uploading to CreateSpace and Kindle Direct, but your friends and family won't be able to go to their local Barnes & Noble and order your book - yet. And your legions of Twitter followers and Facebook fans and the rest of the world will have to sign on to Amazon or SmashWords or CreateSpace to obtain your book when it first comes out. Not that that's a bad thing necessarily, but some people in this world don't like to buy from Amazon.


Is sweat beading on your furrowed brow right now? Are you having heart palpitations just thinking about it all?


If you are it's okay. Take a deep breath, bookmark this page, and come back and read it again in a few days after you let it all sink in.  Then follow the links and get started, that is unless you've decided that writing query letters is easier after all.


COMING UP NEXT POST: A list of some really great folks that I worked with and can recommend to you as well as other nifty facts you should know before you leap over the edge of the self-pub cliff.